Thursday, April 22, 2010

I Know I Got The Talent, so...

...why can't I get anywhere?

I turned 24 today, and I was just thinking... it seems like I'm wasting so much time. Yeah I'm young but, time is time. :|

Maybe because I probably can never find time to make a portfolio for a pitch. I'm always drawing things for everyone else (i.e. commissions and clientele) and can never find time to put my own resume-stuff together. And it sucks because I know I can do most of the staff that people in the industry does, but I'm always stuck drawing one-pieced characters, nothing elaborate that can drive my portfolio, no time for drawing a sequential excerpt, etc.

And the biggest thing that sucks is that I can't afford to work on that stuff. I need commissions to help me keep bread on the table. The Job market (part-time, even) is just getting straight nasty out there, and it's not helping that my regular job is kinda hinting at the "ok, so we keep taking days off your schedule; get up and leave already" mentality.

I know this is hurting me, when my gallery is comprised of the same rinse-and-repeat thing on almost every single piece. I have no time and at the end of the day, energy, to work towards putting together a solid portfolio. This is why I never get my hopes up anymore with anything.

There just has to be something that can change soon. :(

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